As I type this out, these Jordan’s go on sale at End in 5 hours and 3 minutes. That means if you are reading this on Monday, they are already sold all the way out unless you are one of those dudes that wear a size 8 or 13. Sure, the small or the tall might be able to move on one of the last pairs but I’m not certain that I would consider them necessarily lucky.
I mean, sure the elephant skin is dirty dope and the Jordan V is one of my favorite renditions of wanting to be like Mike. And when I was eleven those butterfly lace locks were the stuff dreams were made of right behind bikini posters of Kathy Ireland. But guys, am I batshit crazy for not vibing on the red/orange/pink trim? Maybe they look better in person, but if that peach/pussy color is “infrared” then I need to get my eyes checked.
If you’re all in either way, head over to End to get in line.
That’s right, GBV Spring ’14. I know what you’re thinking. “But it’s January. Early January.” But how else are you gonna be first up to bat with that La Flor print before someone in your crew snatches it up? You can’t buy that shit after your boy Fritz gets his mitts on it. You know errrrybody will be, “Oh yeah, that’s that shirt Fritz has.” You can’t be all, “Fuck Fritz, he can’t even spell OCBD. I BEEN WEARING GITMAN V SINCE ’93!”
Scooping up GBV prints ain’t like 3sixteen’s “the last shall be first” slogan. When it comes to GBV’s Mon Chou Chou print, THE FIRST SHALL BE FIRST!
Give winter (and Fritz) the bird at Need Supply.
Few things are more advantageous than exceptional neckwear. A great tie makes a bad shirt better, a sad man somehow satisfied and a drunk man seem sober. There is a reason we wear them to job interviews, courtrooms and all times we are looking to impress. And while I like to use the tie as a bit of a rakish statement piece, everyone needs a classic. For that, nothing trumps navy and for the element of the dandy, I like to wink and nod with a grenadine. The textured patterns, for which the grenadine gets its namesake, do just enough eye-catching without losing its elegance. Somewhere in this tie’s pattern is a lesson for us all.
From Arcuri, “We do not share the world’s mad obsession for quantity; rather, we give preference to a small and limited number of products, allowing us to strictly monitor the creation of each and every one of our ties. Everything we do revolves around the virtues of artisanship, quality, exclusivity and measure, which have nowadays become more or less extinct.”
There are ties and there are ties and this one is indeed the latter. Make your way over to Linkson Jack to scout it out along with a wealth of other accompanying accessories.
You know what’s really menswear? Print pants. The more ornate print, the better. You’re gonna want your pants to look like you’re trying to stay camouflaged in a fucking fabric store.
You know what’s really, really menswear right now? Elastic waist with drawstring. Belts are for idiots. Plus you got to tuck your shirt in to show peeps that you are so on point when choosing the size of your elastic waist action that you don’t even have to tie that shit and just let the drawstring dangle.
You know what’s menswear maximum at this moment? Drop crotch, which I call “dump crotch” since it looks like you’ve taken a shat, thus lowering the crotcherly area of your trousers. Keep ‘em guessing on why you need a little more room down there for penis size, a possible rash or adult diapers.
You know what’s extremely menswear at this very second? Elastic cuff. The tighter the better. I mean, we don’t want to go back to tight-rolling our shit, do we? I need my pants to look exactly like sweatpants without actually being sweatpants.
Take a further look at the varying options at Atrium.
Anyone else notice that Keanu Reeves new Ronin 47 movie looks just like the Matrix but instead of him playing an emo-internet-warrior he plays an chubby-caucasian-samurai? How many damn times do you need to save the world, Keanu? Neo saves us from robots, Ted “Theodore” Logan saves us from a future dystopian society, John Constantine from Satan, Special Agent John ‘Johnny’ Utah from Patrick Swayze. Just like Keanu only makes shitbag deluxe movies, The Hill-Side only makes awesome ties. Stay tuned for tomorrow’s post in which I loosely tie Paul Walker’s death to loopback sweaters on Mr. Porter.
From NS, “The fabric design is a unique construction that the Hill-Side developed with Colimbo’s Japan factory that mimics the piping of the vintage Brown’s Beach jackets that originated at the turn of the century in Worcester, MA. Wool and cotton blend beach cloth neck tie with taped edges. 52% Cotton, 38% Wool, 10% Polyester. Made in Japan.”
At Need Supply.
ESPN is reporting that LeBron isn’t happy with the latest version of his self-titled sneaker monstrosity and is not willing to wear them during games. Well, I can’t blame him for not wanting to be seen in public wearing these hot pieces of shit. Who wants to wear a dumpster fire on their feet? They look like Optimus Prime had shoe sex with Bansky’s grandmother and spawned these wretched devil boots which apparently hurt your feet when trying to use them for their original intent.
Head on over to Nike for more looks you sadomasochistic bastard.